the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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