The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
