Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
