so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
