Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
