why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
We need to get me chipped asap
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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