I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I smell like Dick and happiness
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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