You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
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