She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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