i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
