I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Randomize
