just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize