there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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