ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
