Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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