Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
