I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
