# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
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