There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
