Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
