Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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