My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Randomize
