well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
There r osticjed everywhere
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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