hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
