dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
