Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Randomize