guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
