ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
