some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
i think im in europe. pls send help
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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