Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
My balls are so social today.
We got so high we made milksteak
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
