I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
