He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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