i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
two words: eviction party
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Randomize
