So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
