I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
