How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
