We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
