YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I enjoy the company of your penis
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
