i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
