I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Randomize
