is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
