dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
