Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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