Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
