She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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