what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
NoShamevember. You game?
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
