Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
