so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
