can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I have surprise drugs for everyone
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize