it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
The air taste purple.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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