The maid of honor just puked.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
