I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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